Shannon Meehan and Dr. Roger Thompson will speak at 7:00 p.m. on Wednesday, April 7 in Room 149 in the Hooper-Schaefer Fine Arts Center on the campus of Baylor University. Admission is free. Meehan and Thompson will talk about “Beyond Duty,” a book they co-authored about Meehan’s experiences while serving in Iraq.
The following is an interview with Meehan and Thompson conducted by Robert Darden and published in the April 2010 issue of the Wacoan.
Shannon Meehan and the Hero’s Journey
‘Beyond Duty: Life on the Front Line in Iraq’
Lt. Shannon Meehan was and is a hero. A decorated commander in Iraq, he fought alongside his troops in the violent killing fields of Diyala Province. And when U.S. and coalition forces sought to retake Baqubah, a town controlled by brutal al-Qaida forces, Meehan’s task force was at the vanguard of the fighting.
In the summer of 2007, amid the street-fighting and chaos, Lt. Meehan ordered a missile strike on a house thought to be controlled by enemy fighters. He followed every protocol, took every precaution.
But in the aftermath of the strike, eight civilians, including children, were dead.
Shortly thereafter, he inadvertently stepped on an IED (improvised explosive device) and found himself in rehab back in the United States.
But for Shannon Meehan, the deeper wounds and the more painful scars were emotional, and the healing has been slower still.
“Beyond Duty: Life on the Front Line in Iraq” is that rare book about war that is both a crackling good adventure yarn and a fascinating journey inside a warrior’s soul. It has met with universally strong reviews. As Tim O’Brien (the author of “The Things They Carried” and a National Book Award winner) wrote, “I will return to this book often.” Meehan has been featured in The New York Times and a host of other media outlets and is currently on the short list for an upcoming appearance on “Oprah.”
“Beyond Duty” is co-written with Dr. Roger Thompson, once Meehan’s professor at Virginia Military Institute (VMI), a Baylor University graduate (BA ’93 and MA ’95), an expert on Ralph Waldo Emerson and the author of dozens of academic articles.
Their unlikely partnership has resulted in a brutally authentic, uncommonly precise book, that rare combination that combines the best of two worlds.
Meehan and Thompson will speak at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, April 7 in Room 100 in Marrs McLean Science Building on the Baylor University campus. Admission is free.
WACOAN: Shannon, how did you choose first VMI, then the U.S. Army?
Shannon Meehan: VMI works with all four branches of the military, but if you go there and you find that none of them are for you, then you don’t have to commission, you can just go into the civilian world. You can find your niche. It was the perfect school for me. I worked a great deal with the Army ROTC department. They had great officers who really helped develop me as far as the leader I was able to become. I really wanted to emulate them. So the draw that I first had to the Army was being surrounded by such great guys, officers and other soldiers there. I wanted to be a part of that. At the time, I saw myself perhaps eventually going to law school, becoming a lawyer.
WACOAN: How did the two of you first contact each other?
Roger Thompson: Shannon was actually my student and my advisee at VMI years ago. He took at least one class from me and actually may have taken another. After he graduated, like most of our advisees, he went off and I lost touch with him. A couple of years later, I began working on some research with another cadet, Jeremy Clements. It was Jeremy who put me back in touch with Shannon while Shannon was in Iraq. We began sending emails back and forth. That’s how we reconnected.
WACOAN: What was it you saw in those emails that suggested that there might be something more here?
Thompson: I had a fellowship at Harvard, where I was working on a book on Emerson, when I got one of these emails from Shannon. Shannon didn’t write a lot of emails but when he did, he took a lot of time. And this one just punched me in the gut.
I had one of those moments of academic crisis where I’m thinking, ‘OK, I know who’s going to read my book. I know all three of those people. I already know what those three people think about my Emerson ideas. On the other hand, I get this email from this kid, a former student of mine in Iraq, and the email is a confession, basically.’ It was just one of those moments that kind of changed my life. I thought, ‘Does what I’m doing matter in the same way that what he does matters?’
WACOAN: And your academic publisher encouraged you to consider writing a book on the topic.
Thompson: Right. I called Shannon and said, ‘Hey, would you maybe be interested in something like this?’ He thought about it and I thought a lot about it, and then in December we drafted a couple sample chapters and a proposal and sent them off to Polity Press. They got back to us in June, and the editors and the creative team loved it. The marketing folks at the press were very nervous because they feared market saturation on Iraq stories. And that makes sense. But we made the argument, ‘Look, you may have a lot of books on Iraq but you don’t have any books — zero books — on civilian casualties from a first person point of view … what that means and what that does.’
WACOAN: Shannon, I realize some of the dialog was recreated later, but part of what is extraordinary about ‘Beyond Duty’ is the level of detail on what you did on any given experience or maneuver. This really is an amazing amount of specific detail.
Meehan: Going into this project, I certainly had a number of concerns. That was one of the major ones: How well would I be able to remember everything? One thing that helped certainly was that I did extensive journaling while I was there. There were a few emails and letters back home that were very detailed and painted an accurate picture of what we were going through over there at the time.
As I re-read those, as Roger and I talked about it and wrote through it, I believe it was the emotional attachment that I had to these memories that really enabled them to come pouring back. The way we had thought we’d go about writing the book actually drastically changed because once it started to come back to me, the different events came flooding back. That’s one of the reasons we finished the first draft in four or five months. We knew as we were writing that we’d have to go back and do a great deal of fixing, polishing and everything, but at that time we weren’t concerned with that as much as what the memories were. I believe it was that emotional attachment that really helped it along.
WACOAN: Were there times that the emotional attachment was such that you couldn’t sustain that intensity?
Meehan: As we wrote chapter one, which deals with me leaving my family, leaving my father, leaving my brother and leaving my wife, AJ, I didn’t even realize how much that meant to me at that time, how many emotions were attached to that. But as we discussed it, I just completely broke down. I couldn’t believe how upsetting or sad that memory was. I was so close to the feelings I was going through then that I felt as if I was going through them all over again. It really was difficult at times. I was fortunate enough to work with someone like Roger who really understood and respected that. We’d talk for a while about rather difficult things and he’d leave me alone knowing I needed that for a few days. Or he’d call and I’d say, ‘I can’t do it right now.’
WACOAN: Roger, in your opinion, why would someone undertake to make public something so gut-wrenching?
Thompson: I think Shannon’s real personal motivation, on the personal side, was that it was a healing process for him. This is not to say that all is fine and perfect these days, but this was a real strong process of healing, a kind of shaping and ordering things for him, of trying to make sense of it all. That was a really intensive writing experience.
There is also a broader sense of letting other soldiers know that it’s OK to tell your story, and that, in fact, your story needs to be told. And, even broader than that, we’d been very explicit in the kind of unabashedly explosive goals for this book — to try to form a larger national dialog about the cost of war. We’ve tried to remove the politics from that. We situated it within personal narratives and ideas [so] that any assessment of war means taking into account some of these stories. So there are layers of motivation there, I think.
WACOAN: Were you able to work face-to-face or was this a long distance writing relationship?
Thompson: It was a mixture, but primarily long distance. We met a couple times but mostly phone interviews. What would typically happen is that Shannon had given me his journal and all his letters and emails from his time in Iraq. I would read through them, call him, and we would do an interview. They started out shorter, about an hour and a half each time. About halfway through working on the book, they would be about two to three hour phone interviews. I would try to draft a couple chapters out of an interview, and then send a draft to Shannon for comments. It would go back and forth that way.
WACOAN: ‘Beyond Duty’ is definitely Shannon’s voice, but it is parsed in this elegant, startlingly clear prose. That is a rare combination.
Thompson: Thank you. We worked super, super hard on that. I describe it as ‘method acting’ — where the person gives themselves over to the voice of the character. There was a weird transference happening and part of it is that Shannon’s story tapped into my own life narratives, some of the themes of things I’ve been working on — there was some sort of correspondence.
I tried really hard to listen to Shannon. I tried really hard to capture key elements of his voice. We wanted real consistency. And I was really interested in having a kind of rhythm and momentum at times that pull the reader along. I was sensitive to that — and, at the same time, making sure that Shannon’s voice was clear and consistent. We worked hard on that and part of it is the bond that we formed while writing.
There were times when Shannon got really emotional; he would kind of just disappear for a couple of days. There would be no way I could get in contact. And sometimes I needed a break. The emotional evolvement was so deep that any attempt to consciously control that voice disappeared fairly quickly and integrated in some sort of way into what we were doing. While we were aware of it, we gave ourselves over to it at some point, and it seemed to have turned out very well.
WACOAN: I was struck with the way the two of you were able to convey the headlong emotion, tension and excitement of the actual various firefights you were involved in — and still somehow make sense of it all.
Meehan: As I mentioned before, dealing with some of the more pragmatic issues like that, what exactly happened during a firefight, I relied on my notes. There was also a lot of talk between the guys in my platoon or company and me. I did have great pictures of what happened, and I would talk about it with them to make sure that everything I pictured was accurate, that this soldier did that and so forth. Talking with them and getting their perspective on a given mission or firefight really helped as well because we did really focus a great deal on maintaining accuracy — especially in the different missions that we were involved in. We wanted to paint an accurate picture for anyone who read it. I still had a great deal of what I’ve written as part of the mission planning, which helped me as well. It put me back in that place, along with my journaling and relying on the soldiers and their perspective of what happened in these battles. All that together really helped us nail that accuracy.
WACOAN: What has been the response of former soldiers to the book now that they’ve had some time and distance from the events depicted?
Meehan: This was another concern I had — of not only how the Army would receive the book, or how other soldiers would receive it, but how my own soldiers would receive it. They are characters in the book. I worried, ‘How are they going to feel about it?’ So I’m even more surprised about how excited they are about it and how much they appreciate it. There hasn’t been any negative feedback from any of them. It’s been great — and very relieving for me in a sense.
I think they really appreciate that someone had taken their story and put it in printed words as something they can read themselves. That helps them put order to what happened and gives them something to share with their families, their wives and their children when they grow older, to say that this is what your father went through and this is what you were able to accomplish over there. It’s really all of our stories. It was a terribly difficult deployment. We all met with great challenges but overall we did accomplish a great deal in Iraq. It’s something they should be very proud of.
WACOAN: Roger, has there ever been a sense since ‘Beyond Duty’ came out — either from VMI folks or from U.S. military folks — that this is a subject that shouldn’t be talked about?
Thompson: The military community seems to have really embraced this book. I’m sure Shannon was nervous at first to come forward with this for that very reason. He is going to be breaking his code of silence. But what we found far and away is just amazing acceptance and encouragement, especially the soldiers and veterans coming forward to share their stories and to encourage Shannon to keep sharing his. These service members fully embrace it because they recognize the honesty.
Here’s the key thing: I think they recognize that it’s not about Shannon. It’s not about glory-making in any sort of way. It’s just about making it. They understand that he’s trying to help other people understand what they’re going through, which I think is particularly needed right now.
It is interesting to see at some of the events where a lot of soldiers or veterans will come forward to talk to Shannon and me — but a number of them will only go to Shannon. It’s that bond. They know he’s going to understand things, that this is private, that this is between two soldiers. While we’re very open with each other, there are a lot of those things Shannon keeps private. These are private confessions that have been told to him that he’s holding for them. It’s really amazing.
WACOAN: Shannon, despite some of the horrific things that you and the men under your command saw and heard, ‘Beyond Duty’ implies that you left Iraq with a deep affection for the average Iraq citizen.
Meehan: Absolutely. I still carry that with me, especially the children of poor families and the working classes who are just basically trying to get by and not even having the luxury of the greater concerns of the state of their country. They just needed to know how they were going to feed their family next week. People in that position, the children in that position, I felt a great deal of sympathy for. We really did pride ourselves on affording those families better lives, improving the quality of their lives. At times, that was a challenge to maintain — especially in days or weeks following the deaths of your own soldiers. You wanted to lash out at all Iraqis. But for me, I always tried to keep a strong sense of logic about that, to understand the difference. There is an enemy out there trying to do horrible things, but for the most part the Iraqi people had nothing to do with that. They were even more helpless and powerless than we were. They are the ones we were there to protect.
WACOAN: Growing up as a military brat, all of the officers I ever knew hated war.
Thompson: When we’ve spoken sometimes in public forums, what most of us hate hearing the most is, ‘So? That’s what you signed up for.’ What I’ve witnessed is that anytime that is said in a public forum, there’s just an immediate response from soldiers. They say, ‘How dare you say something like that? You just have no idea what you’re saying if you say something like that.’ We do see that response from the broader civilian public sometimes.
You can see this in some of the comments to The New York Times editorial: ‘Hey, that’s just the cost of war.’ But soldiers don’t say that. There may be some people trying to make Shannon feel better by saying that, but by and large, that’s not something that comes out of their mouths. It’s some other vision of war that is not connected to the reality of it.
WACOAN: It has been nearly three years since the specific events of that terrible day that precipitated the writing of this book. Shannon, what has changed for you emotionally since the book came out a few months ago?
Meehan: It has really been an emotional roller coaster. While I was writing and working on it, that’s where my focus remained. I remember the healing power that writing provided. But after we were finished, I felt, ‘What now? Where do I go from here?’ That’s when I began sharing with other people and giving talks, making the best of the tragedy by sharing the story, by connecting with veterans. Just talking to the general public, sharing light on the struggles of soldiers and civilians in this war, is good.
At the same time, when I give these talks, it makes me vulnerable to the public. I knew that would be the case with the op-ed piece I did in The New York Times — all those comments under it. I knew a lot of them would not have a positive reaction to it or sympathize. Things like that are very difficult to read, very difficult to receive, and it was a struggle. I’ve tried to divorce myself from my personal emotions and understand that there is an overall good here in people talking about it.
Doing things like the op-ed piece, going places and talking about it, has helped create this space in society for these issues to be discussed. I can’t worry about different people’s opinions on it. The goal is to get people talking about it, to create a dialog in society about these. I’ve really tried to keep that dialog in mind and understand that it’s OK, it’s a good thing — even though I’m sacrificing a level of my own personal comfort to do so — it’s for an overall good, an overall better.
WACOAN: Roger, what were your personal hopes and dreams as you went out of your comfort zone as an academic to write ‘Beyond Duty?’
Thompson: I had a couple very personal things attached to this. As I heard about Shannon’s story, I wanted him to find something close to peace, something that would at least approximate peace some of the time. It’s hard hearing his story and not wanting that for him. Then for me, there are some shared threads in the narrative of what was going on, some of the scenes that started resonating with me in ways that I was not anticipating. It’s one of those things that there is a certain level of serendipity about. And as the process went along, I felt myself trying to figure out, ‘Why is this affecting me? What is this doing? How is this story going to shape my own narrative of how I cope and understand my own life story?’
And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that this is an opportunity for me to finally move outside the realm of academic writing, which I’ve been wanting to do for quite some time. This was a great opportunity, to write something that would really matter.
WACOAN: And Shannon, what changes have come since the recent birth of your first child?
Meehan: I imagine that all parents meet that with a level of anxiety or fear, but for me it felt much greater realizing what I’m about to bring this blessing, this gift into the world — the same type of blessing that I had myself destroyed in Iraq, the same type of blessing that I robbed someone else of. The fear that spiraled from that has all been very difficult to deal with. I have to work hard to realize and understand that I do deserve this blessing. More than that, my son deserves to be treated and raised well, to be raised right. Too often I would think with the state I’m in, the conflicts I’ve had over this, ‘How can I raise an emotionally healthy son? And where does my wife fit into all of this?’
A good friend shared a thought that has helped me a good deal: ‘Look at it this way — he’s your son and he doesn’t know what you did in Iraq. All he knows is that he needs a mother and a father to love him and care for him.’ He deserves that. And it’s my duty to provide that for him. I’ve really tried to resolve myself to that.
